NGPriest: Thanks for the chain letters

Ξ January 11th, 2009 | → 0 Comments | ∇ Author: NGPriest |

To all my friends and family

Thank you for making me feel safe, secure, blessed and wealthy by sending me your chain letters over the past year.

Because of your concern:

I no longer drink anything out of a can because I will get sick from the rat droppings.

I no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer.

I no longer go to movies because I could sit on a needle infected with AIDS.

I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could get pricked with a needle infected with AIDS.

I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and try to rob me.

I no longer accept packages from UPS or FedEx since they might be Al Quada in disguise.

I no longer get real “hugs” anymore because these pesky little bears keep giving me hugs via the net.

I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a stupid number for which I will get a phone bill from hell with calls to Uganda, Singapore, and Uzbekistan.

I no longer look at the opposite sex because they will take my kidneys and leave me taking a nap in a bathtub full of ice.

I no longer buy expensive cookies from Nieman Marcus since I now have their recipe.

I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl about to die in the hospital for the 1,000th time.

I no longer have any money but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL are sending me since I participated in their special e-mail program. I want to thank all of you soooooooooo much for looking out for me! Now if you DON’T send this e-mail to at least 12 people in the next 60 seconds, a large bird will crap on your head.

 

Comments

Name (required)

Email (required)

Website

XHTML: You can use these tags: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>

Share your wisdom

RSS

    Welcome to

    NGPriest's Blog


    There are 6,021 posts and 302 comments so far. Feel invited to browse the archives, read the about or comment on the latest post.

    Search:

    • BananaStatio is 23/M/KL, KL, Malaysia
    • ChambyT is 1x/F/Sungai Bakap, Penang, Malaysia
    • chingyi1807 is 1x/F/Malaysia
    • CopyCatty is 1x/M/Hong Kong
    • crazymango is 15/F/Malaysia
    • Eliteratty is ??/M/???
    • HolySprings is 18/M/Sungai Bakap, Penang, Malaysia
    • jaigralia is unknown...
    • Jykur0 is 14/M/Indonesia
    • MakoJr is 1x/M/Singapore
    • NGPriest is 19/M/Brisbane, QLD, Australia
    • PoringCat098 is 1x/F/Malaysia
    • Saphira is 15/F/George Town, Penang, Malaysia
    • shiningthrust is 13/M/Singapore
      shiningthrust is Single
    • sianzxd is 18/M/George Town, Penang, Malaysia
    • Swifty13 is 1x/M/United Kingdom
    • WingzOfChaos is 15/M/Singapore
      Single/Lonely/Depressed

Random stuff!

  • Loved by Some,
    Hated by Many,
    Envied by Most,
    Yet Wanted by Plenty
  • 10% luck
    20% skill
    15% concentrated power of will
    5% pleasure
    50% pain
    100% reason to remember the name!
  • I write your name in my breath on the window, Sit and watch as it fades away
  • Hi honey.
    Guess what I did at work today?
    I wore a bomb.
    A nuclear bomb in a field of flowers.
    I could get lucky.
    Tomorrow I could have a bigger bomb.
    I could kill more people.
    Maybe they'll be innocent people.
    Children, maybe.
  • "You are like a plague, John Crichton,
    and you have ruined my life . . .
    and yet
    I just keep coming back."
  • I'll watch the night turn light blue
    But it's not the same without you
    Because it takes two to whisper quietly
    The silence isn't so bad
    Till I look at my hands and feel sad
    Cause the spaces between my fingers
    Are right where yours fit perfectly

Search